Strange mood today. Woke up with a sadness. In the afternoon I walked under the trees, eating fallafel. Looking up at the naked branches the thought came to me that they would never bloom again. Maybe winter has finally caught up with me. I saw a big white dog observing me and half wished that it would tear itself from its owner and come running at me.

The angel

My heart started to pound before I reached her. I could tell from far. She was one of those that come alive. Between the great wing and her shoulder I found the angle where she was a human being.

On the bus between Oslo and Gothenburg a woman was sitting across the isle from me. She had the stone angels profile. She was reading a book about zombies, and once she caught my eye.

Faces in krakow

Glorious morning

Head heavy from smoke but light from newly awaken dreams. My morning was perfect, walked through Krakow with Coldplays newest album in my ears, a borrowed camera in my hand. Pictures started coming to me and it was like being born again, or waking up for the second time that morning. The café we re in has a french and a polish name, and three bikes in a corner.

The third time in Krakow...

...is here and now. And I am the same person everywhere. When I was on my way and in the air it felt like my heart sank into its right place. I always seem to find myself in middlelands. I think I love that feeling, which is why I seek it.

Sound

...is so important for my well being... the absence of sound, memories of voices, music on the radio... Right now light and silence, except a distant murmur from above (neighbours) make this place, this one room that I occupy and that is entirely my own. The result is homely, dreamlike and sleepy. (If that was a description of a place in a guide book, I would go there.)

Watch out...

...there is a big wave washing in. Why are expectations so powerful? And so complicated when mixed in with friendship?

Disappointment

My disappointment usually comes in the form of a great wave, washing over me and toppling me over, leaving me gasping for air.
Yesterday it came like a fog, slowly creeping in, making things blurry around the edges and leaving me indecisive and kind of heavy hearted.
I think it is starting to clear again now. Getting easier to move through.

This man is a great poet. Stay tune for some of his, yet unpublished, work.

"It´s like magical or something."

We´re In California, at dusk, quite a long time ago. Maybe 2005, definately in the autumn. Her name was Julie and her car was full of vitamin bars. She looked for a new place to live, someplace where her soul would settle. We were on our way to Santa Barbara, to see if that was it.

nyårsdagen glad
ett favorituttryck: hög och klar (om himmel)
jagar årets första bebis

det finaste igår var att stå rakt under
när himlen exploderade i färger
och tycka om mänskligheten
i form av vänner
sedan cykla hem

en liten oro av en lessen röst i telefonen strax innan tolvslag nummer två